Monday, March 21, 2011

Don't Be A Jerk, Or Where Have The Ethics Gone?

(I will first say that I'm writing this way ahead of when it will be published. So for anyone who wants to try to figure out if something specific set me onto this topic, you're probably wrong in your suspicions. But if you feel nervous after reading it, this topic might apply to you.)

I'd like to call for an end to the sniping, backbiting, sabotaging of other people, and extreme unethical behavior that I've seen personally, and heard about from people in other places, from some wedding vendors. Notice that I don't call them "professionals," because if you behave that way you really aren't professional.

Now I have to say that there are plenty of people who do display ethical behavior, but all it takes is one or two jerks to ruin a good time. I like to work with people who take their jobs seriously, and who also treat other pros with professionalism. It's better for the relationships between vendors, and for the wedding industry as a whole. If you're new to the industry, no, it isn't true that you have to have an everyone-for-himself attitude to be successful.

The problem that I've seen lately is that for whatever reason, there seems to be an increase in the level of nyeh nyeh-nyeh-type conversation that goes on. It's discouraging to see. I have my suspicions about why it's happening, but all I know for sure is that I don't want to deal with it.

The people who I like to work with are the ones who don't feel the need to point fingers and run each other down. They concentrate on doing their own jobs and don't base their businesses on what other people are doing. They're proactive, not reactive. They deliver what they're supposed to, and they don't feel the need to run down other businesses in order to do their jobs well.

Luckily, as I'm writing this I'm thinking of all the people in the wedding industry in Richmond who ARE professional in every sense of the word. There are plenty of them, and I appreciate working with them all. If you know who you are, then thanks, and I'll look forward to working with you in the future.

Kara Buntin owns A Cake To Remember LLC, custom wedding cakes in Richmond VA
 Kara Buntin owns A Cake To Remember LLC in Richmond VA, and cake supplies online at and


Anonymous said...

I agree, mean people suck. Unfortunately they are in every profession and some are even your neighbors or family members. Where indeed have all the good manners and morals gone?
cindy/cindy's cakery

Andrea Boudewijn said...

Hear hear! Just like high school, I find that the most insecure of wedding folks are the ones that feel a need to criticize and snipe. The mature, good business owners will pat another on the back -- not cut down. My personal policy is *never* to comment on another person's cake, bad or good, unless the baker themselves is asking for real feedback in private. There's no room in my business for slimy people, be they client, industry member, or baker.

Magnolia said...

What a beautiful post! Thank you for sharing!