More Cake Serving Fun, or, If You're Going To Be Rude, You'd Better Be Right.

So I was setting a cake up, minding my own business, when the person at the venue who was going to cut the cake came over. He wanted to know what the cake flavors were, so I told him.

Then he asked if I brought a box for the top tier, and I said yes. Then he kind of leaned forward and said "Did you bring a box for the leftover cake? Because you people always make too much cake."

Well, uh, what? I told him that I don't bring boxes for the leftovers because the way I calculate it there usually aren't any. He got all huffy and told me that there's usually half a tier left over, and then kind of got a triumphant tone in his voice and said "When people are drinking they don't eat as much cake!"

No $&*#, Sherlock, I told him that I tell people that, so if their guests are going to be drinking a lot they don't need as much cake. I also informed him that I also ask if there will be another dessert served, or a candy buffet, or if it's a big sit-down dinner, in which case I don't sell them as much either.

This kind of slowed his roll a little, but he said "Well, how many servings is that cake?" I asked him what the guest count was, and he said about 110. I told him that the cake was designed to serve around 80-85, which would be what he needed and not a lot more.

Then I decided to point out the obvious, and said that it pretty much depends on how he was going to cut the cake, and that if he didn't know how to cut it then he might have some left over.

He got all snotty on me and said "I know how to cut a cake, It's 1" by 1 1/2."

"No, you moron, it's 1" by 2", no wonder you have extra cake" I replied (without the moron part.)

So he looked all surprised and said "So I'm supposed to cut in 2" then 1"?"

I showed him how to cut the cake and he was suddenly a lot nicer. But TOO LATE, he is now on my idiot list.

I should have done the math for him to demonstrate that if you cut 1/2" less, that's 25% less. That would result in 25% of the cake that should have been served that wasn't, which means that you'd have cake left over when it should have been eaten.

So the moral of the story is, once again, that we can do as much calculating as possible to estimate serving counts, but if the person cutting the cake is lacking a clue, it won't help. Also, if you're going to be obnoxious and pick on people for no reason you'd better know what you're doing before you blame them for your mistake. Even if you bring a cutting chart, it's likely that people like that will ignore it and do what they want to, then blame you for it later. We might have to start bringing a ruler to show people how big an inch is. For pete's sake...

Kara Buntin owns A Cake To Remember LLC,  online cake supplies at and